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Wherein Pam sings the praises of doodling, bemoans her own humanity and promises to hum us all through the darkest week…

In homage to Havi’s Friday Chickens over on the The Fluent Self — This is the place I review my week – in an attempt to track some things – like progress on my novel and… living intentionally. I shake out my week and lay it out. Let the hard burn off and the good sink in. Call it an experiment in paying attention. Feel free to join in.

A week… a week…

another super fast week.

Twas good.
On the whole.
I think.
Let’s see….

The Quick Chicken (The Doings that help me with the Being):

Ostrich on the Masai Mara (P.Bustin 2008)

Ostrich on the Masai Mara

Work on NIP: Some up. Some down. But steady ahead.

Walks: Glorious. Sparkly and lush with cold.

Guitar: not much boom-chiKA-boom-chiKA but some boom boom boom boom. Again steady as she goes.

Yoga/Meditation: deLISH!

THIS WEEK’S EXPERIMENT: to give Pree the Purple guitar some loving attention.

THE RESULT: better than last week but… still no singing…what is UP with that????

And…the rest of the week…

THE BIG SADS:

– sad, so sad, so heartsore sad to have lost a friend to the dreaded C. May your spirit soar, Sir – away from this earthly plane and on into… the next.

– and… Connecticut… no words for that but a simple prayer…. “heal the brokenhearted and bind up their wounds”

THE GNARBLY BITS:

– mphtty rrmmphtty hard HARD start to the writing week. words not coming… lost wanderings around in the NIP thinking… “what the HECK am I trying to DO here?”

– not being the … beacon of calm and compassion I dream of being. Meaning… snapping at someone and then feeling like a huge pile of crappola for said snapping.

– feeling like I should be some sort of island of calm that people can land on – and proceed to stomp all over – grrrrrrr! – no…no… no stomping . But I do feel that I SHOULD be calmer and I SHOULD be more compassionate and …

– I still BURY myself in these stoopid SHOULDS. sigh.

– and the return of the “I need to”. I hear myself say this all day long… and write it in the scrib… I need to do this…I need to do that… “YERK,” I say. “Stop with the “need to” and the “should” and the whole kit and kabootle!!

THE TASTY BITS:

+ sticking WITH the writing and finding my way through to Joy Joy JOY again by Thursday and Friday.

++ the realization that even when things don’t seem to be going well, doing my “Writing Hours” is working at keeping the DREADS away. It’s like magic. Huzzah! I can actually just… walk away and let it go after I’ve done my hours. I can enjoy the rest of the day without that awful awful… feeling of… abject FAILURE I used to drag around all the time. I never felt like I was working “hard enough”.  Working these hours every day, faithfully, has lifted that and freed me up soooo much.

+ the morning routine/rituals are really working for me. love love love it!

+ walks in the snow.

+ having time for walks in the snow.

+ taking a rest hour on the couch. Not a real nap… but a relax at least. managed a few this week and ahhhhh — feels soooo good.

+ morning waking warm abed. YUM.

+ doodling. I stopped by a friend’s blog and was admiring her doodles. They got me scratching away in the scrib-book again VISUALLY. I love it. This blog also has some wise wise words that warmed my heart on a gloomy day. Much thanks and gratitude to the fierce and lovely Fionncara.

lola - from the Mostly Happy Suitcase

Lola – from the Mostly Happy Suitcase

I think I would like to doodle more, doodle each day. Heh heh. Oh heck ya, Pam – add another thing.

I might… but listen up Gentle Reader — you know that these things I add must not become truly… regimented. They are ways of playing in the world and I need to do this – play more – see these things as play – yes and then and also I must play in my work – the work I am here to do. Which is the writing.

We are all here to do something. This is one of the truths I hold to.

One of the hard things is finding our way to that work and keeping strong enough to DO it. May we all find our way.

NEXT WEEK’S EXPERIMENT:

I would like to work on the…. time-stretch. Finding the ability to PAUSE in the moment and take a breath in times of hurry or anxiety. Mostly as a way to respond from a thoughtful gentle place instead of simply REACTING to certain things.

OK folks…that’s it for me….

I hope your week was full of glory …

Thanks for stopping by.

Have some FUN this week!

I shall hum us all through (feel free to join in)

It is the darkest week of the year…but don’t let it get you down. After all… the world could hit TILT next week. OR We could all just be celebrating the return of the sun.

Hope to see you here next Saturday. Hmmmmm hm hmmmm hmm hmmmmmm…

go easy -p

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